Saturday, September 4, 2010


For many months I lived in the shadow of amiss

Did some things I thought would bring me pure bliss

Things I know I would never be proud of

I’ve compromised my emotions and put it into shove.

Those flashy, red warning signs I see them everywhere

Tells me to run in opposite direction but I didn’t care

I didn’t listen to what my friends are telling

All I hear is my heart beating and this drugged-kind of feeling.

We’ve said our promise for love on that perfect moonlit night

With the cool winds hovering and stars beaming, everything seemed right

Nothing seem to matter but only the love we have for each other

It feels real, sincere, like we have our own world to conquer.

We were both aware of the complications we’re facing

We both know it’s an insurmountable mountain we’re climbing

But as long as you and I are in this together

There’s no storm we couldn’t weather.

Yes, it was a perfect promise we made

Thought I’d only see it in movies played

But soon enough realization struck me

I began to question my sanity.

I was so sure back then I wanted to be with you

Right or wrong, this forbidden affair we’re gonna pursue

Yet circumstances had its way of waking me up

In my deepest slumber, I realized this is all but crap!

All I ever wanted is to chase my happiness

But chasing it in the wrong path doesn’t give me inner peace

I couldn’t be happy knowing I’m hurting someone in the process

I couldn’t forgive myself for wrecking a vow to eternity, their seal of promise.

Maybe you really loved me like you said

Maybe you really cared like you did

Maybe what we both have is real

But for now, only time will tell.

No matter how true and genuine our feelings may be

No matter how strong, how far we’re willing to be

No matter if we’re holding hands at the end of this fight

Still we both know, we were more wrong than we were right.

And so I stopped, gathered myself and came to a decision

This crazy thing we had going on should come to a conclusion

Doing the right thing has always been easy for me

But letting go of someone like you has never been this messy.

I’m trying to be strong, I’m trying to be tough

It’s painful and it’s tearing my heart into half

Each day I’m praying for the pain to go away

I’m summoning my courage to move on anyway.

My days without you will never be the same

What used to be sunshine are now gray skies

Where I used to hear chirping birds are now filled with silence

When my eyes are used to see butterflies now filled with tears.

I’m letting you go and I’m walking away

I’m leaving those dreams that we’re meant to be

Maybe someday, some time, when the stars are right

We’ll see each other amid His guiding light.


MiDniGHt DriVer said...

swerte nya! :-)

galing! kipitap!

Ratz said...

Hey Jan... Hugs gal... Hugs... that is all i can say... Heart break sucks..

Gnetch said...

Aw. Hugs Jan. Hope you're fine.

i'm no miss said...

Soo heartfelt, I could feel you jan. You'll do just fine:)


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