Monday, June 7, 2010

For the first time I can't think of a title...

I'm back! Finally. After 5 days of MIA.

I didn't go anywhere. I wasn't even planning on a blog strike (if there is such a thing), nor a temporary hiatus from writing. I've been through a lot of things lately and I was going through baffling emotions. You know how it is being a girl, so.... And I don't wanna go through the details.

After days of sorting my thoughts I finally came up with something to write. Thanks to Gnetch by the way. This genius girl invented the bloggenator pill claiming to cure writer's block in all serious forms, and other silly excuses you can think of whenever you're too dumb to create a post. And this wonder pill do create miracles. You see, I haven't popped a single pill yet in my mouth but my fingers are gunning for the keyboard already! Well I tried calling the number but the voice on the other line said : "Hey idiot, what makes you think you can afford to buy the pill? Get your ass up and start writing NOW!"

That's how it worked for me. 

Hey Gnetch I think I should have a cut in this, aryt? I'm getting my marketing skills into action hahaha!

So Gnetch, accept this Nobel Prize medal from Alfred Nobel himself.

*this is just a sick joke...wahhahahahhahaahhhahahahhaha!

Anyway, I just want to share something personal with you guys (coz you're all so good to me and I treat you like my real-life friends). I usually don't talk about matters of the heart in my blog because I JUST DON'T WANT TO. Sometimes I feel like I'm not being true to my blog title. between me and my thoughts is suppose to be a personal blog reflecting every bit of emotions and thoughts by the author.

Last week, a fellow blogger wrote a very emotional post about "L". Hey, that's Love, not Lust. okay? I envied her profoundness, sincerity and honesty to show the delicate side of her. 

I wished I had that courage...

Last month I wrote a post about EXes baggage.

Definition of EXes Baggage :

It's a post breakup syndrome where one finds herself stuck in the middle of nowhere. It is the feeling when you knew you have to move on, or tried to move on with the rest of the world, but you simply can't because of the guilt, disappointment, grudge, sorrow you've been carrying along with you.

source : janjan's dictionary

I don't know why  I came up with that. Maybe because I felt more comfortable divulging it to someone who doesn't know me personally. Or because I think that most bloggers are less judgemental. Or maybe I just felt the urge to unburden myself with the ghost from the past. Or because I wanna share to everyone what my friends didn't know. The unedited side of the story.

But sadly, that post remained in my draft until now. I couldn't bring myself to publish it. Maybe someday when strength will find me.



Speaking of the devil/loser/douchebag... did you know that he sent a friend request on Facebook just yesterday? I was flabbergasted when I saw it. Why such a big deal? - you might ask. Well, I'm not good at dealing with EXtra-terrestrial people. I'm not a good sport. I can't pretend like I'm fine and hey we can be best of friends after everything that happened. I mean what's the point? Why only now? Why? Why? After __years of no communication he will just pop up with a friend request and an e-mail asking how am I doing??? WTF?!

Up until now I don't know what am I gonna do about it. Ignore or accept? Geezzz...


Ratz said...

Argh!! Silly men!! They are just senseless aren't they!! Sending a FB request! Stupid souls hahaha.. Like i always maintain- IGNORANCE IS BLISS... Just ignore Jan... you are better off without them....

and thanks for mentioning me over here. I really didn't know why i wrote that post... maybe just a digital proof to be on safer grounds in the future.. in case he comes back... haha.. but you are right- bloggy friends are less judgmental.. somehow we understand written words better than spoken sentences...

Hugs to you...

The Girl Who Loves to Whine said...

Ignore him, you can do better! Anyway accepting his friend request is just going to make the situation more complicated and confusing. And ultimately will probably just leave you feeling even more empty than you were before (I really don't know the situation so I apologize if I'm way off base on this). I also know this is easier said than done, and because I've been known to be pathetic in the past I myself would probably accept the request so maybe you should just ignore this comment.

Gnetch said...

Well, first of all, thanks for the medal. Haha. And, um, okay, you get 5% cut. (Damn!) LOL

And I say ignore the friend request. I swear, if it was me, and I'm still mad at the person, I won't hesitate to ignore it. To let them know that I'm still angry or hurt or whatever. I have 2 Facebook accounts and I blocked my former bestfriend on both just so she can't find me.

And just so you know, this was a very honest post. I've been wanting to do the same but, meh, I just don't have the courage either. I guess in time, I might do something like this. :)

sEy said...

I Agree with them, that for the time being, just ignore the request. It will do no good, because having access to his profile will tempt you looking onto it and then you'll end up being sad and spoil the things around. I don't have any idea what's the real score between the two of you but what am I saying was based on what I'm going through right now.

You can't be friends with him until you get rid of all the negative things and feelings.

I don't have any idea why these mutants have so much guts to ask us "how were doing" when they knew we're not feeling better.

Huuuh, Men.....!

Just be happy, try not to think of negative things, I know it's hard to do but still do it for yourself.

Rachel W. said...

I would say you should ignore the friend request if you feel it will open up old wounds. Why deal with past baggage if you don’t have to? Leave the past in the past.

Keep on blogging your thoughts and feelings my friend, it is very therapeutic. It is your blog and your outlet. :-)

Anonymous said...

If you're not comfortable with it, then don't. Just ignore it. Spare yourself from another heart ache for the pain is still there i can see.

Blog to your hearts content Jan. Don't feel pressured. This should be your vent right? We'll just be here ready to hear you.

Cynthia said...

Following from FMBT. Happy Tuesday :)

Please visit/follow me at

PrestonBunny said...

Great blog and I know what you mean about the writers block!
I found you on follow me back Tuesday.
Hope your well xx

jenskie said...

great post.

btw, hi! jenskie here :) found you in Follow me Back Tuesday. I followed your blog, pls follow back. I joined the Follow back Tuesday on its Week 1.


Erin Wallace said...

Following you from FMBT! Please stop by Dropped Stitches to follow me back!

xo Erin

TV's Take said...

Sounds like your honesty is the key to moving on. Following you from Follow Me Back Tues. Come check me out at


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