When the going gets tough...

...hope I'm tough enough to get going.

Here I am again. Another heartbreak, another heartache. It seems I have a magnet for pulling misery to my side. It always find its way to hook up with me no matter how I try to shield myself from its sting.

Another day to get through... Shackles on my feet, please just let me go. I want to go back to my old self - smiling, feisty, alive. I'm putting on a hard face, pretending to be fine. But it's hard to pull off a show like that. My eyes defy me, my laugh sounds empty, my actions speak otherwise.

I dread everything that reminds me of that someone. The workplace, every corner, every sights. It's like all those memories are plastered everywhere. Mocking me. Taunting me.

If this is goodbye, so be it. Thank you for everything we've shared and for everything that I've become because of it. This is a test, I know. I've had enough what else do I need to prove? To others, my life seemed bright and colorful. Yet I don't want the limelight, I don't want the fame, if pain is all I got in exchange.

I know I made a fool out of myself for writing this post. But somehow it lightens me up. I don't care if I sounded stupid coz this is me hurting. Trying to pick up the pieces and start all over again. Start where I left off. The road to moving on may be miles away. I'm on my feet and I'm getting there someday...